For a long time I was obsessed with this car. My dad still asks me when I will get my Porsche and I still answer “yeah, right”.

But now I don’t see any reason to have a car.

Bir bakışta gördüm sıcaklığını
Bir dokunuşta duydum saflığını
Çocukça bir rengin olduğunu
Bir nefeste çektim dostluğunu
Ve her gece sen
Sen uyurken
Okşadım saçlarını
Uyandırmadan,uyandırmadan,uyandırmadan…

Su gibi dupduru bir can olduğunu
Erken büyüdüğün için yorulduğunu
Denizlerin mavi meleği olduğunu
Bir nefeste çektim dostluğunu
Ve her gece sen
Sen uyurken
Okşadım saçlarını
Uyandırmadan,uyandırmadan,uyandırmadan…

My name is Ayça. It is Turkish. It means the crescent moon. My parents told me they found it in some book for baby names. I guess they were not patient enough to browse other letters. It is a name that is popular for my generation. My roommate in collage, who is one of my best friends, has the same name. So, when people called our apartment, “I want to talk to Ayça” was not enough, they had to specify which Ayça. I really liked it … until I came to the US.

There is no ‘ç’ in the English alphabet. My name is reduced to Ayca here and it is not as cool. A name is an important part of a person’s identity. ‘Ayca’ does not feel like my name. I feel like I lost part of me. But I got used to it.

My husband is having a harder time with his name, which is “Güneş”.

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“Hussein” is a good name. My uncle’s name is “Hüseyin” (it is the Turkish
version). It means “good” or “handsome” or “little beloved”. I don’t understand why it has this bad connotation.

If you are following the news coverage for democratic campaigns, you know that a few conservative press members (and sadly a congressman) are making a big deal of Barack Obama’s middle name, which is “Hussein”. Since it is Arabic, people are implying that his name may be a liability because terrorists may dance on the street if he gets elected! Claiming Barack Obama is a muslim or a someone terrorists would like
because of his middle name does not make any sense at all.

I wonder how stupid you  have to be to come up with that bright argument. Some
people in the world happen  to have Arabic  names.  Not all people
having Arabic names are muslims and NOT ALL MUSLIMS ARE TERRORISTS. Islam is a religion, just like Christianity. And terrorists that commit their crimes in the name of Islam are crazy fundamentalists. I don’t practice religion although my parents are muslims and I was raised as one. It is so sad to see how different people’s perception of Islam in this country is, compared to my understanding of it, which encompasses tolerance and understanding of other cultures. 

I was thinking about posting on this topic. Reading the featured post on this made me write more (I normally write shorter entries). bayouboy1026 wrote “We have a populace of whom, by a recent Washington Post survey, 45%
believe that the earth was created 7000 years ago.  32% believe the sun
revolves around the earth; an equal number that astrology is very
scientific.”

Reminded me of this book review I saw recently. The book is The Age of American Unreason by Susan Jacoby. She shares similar concerns and argues that people’s civic and political decisions emerge from a confused welter of laziness, reckless emotion and prejudice. Often times prejudice coexists with ignorance. What puzzles me most is to see the college educated ignorants. I guess, the education system is failing at raising citizens. But this is a different story…

I used to think that women usually try to change their significant others more compared to men. It is hard to make generalizations and personality is a big part of this whole relationship thing. Recently though, I realized that men do the same thing, just in different ways.

Most of the time, men are not as direct as women. For instance, if your boyfriend hates your best friend, he does not say he hates her but instead finds excuses for not meeting with her. I feel like men express what they like or not more with their behavior (actions) and women more with words. So, thinking about the example above, your boyfriend’s behavior affects you over time and you do not meet with your best friend as often.

It is normal for people to change as a result of a relationship, as long as you don’t end up becoming a fundamentally different person I just think that if men were more open to women and if women were less clinched to the past mistakes in relationships, life would be easier for everyone.

is “Love of my life” by Dave Matthews and Santana. Not that I listen to a lot of love songs but this one is very cool. The lyrics are just amazing. Plus there is a nice guitar solo by Santana, which makes the song more exciting.

1. People who think they don’t need to close their mouth while they are eating.
2. People who talk in the movies
3. Various forms of noise when I am trying to have a quiet nice time.

The third one is like the second one but I think the second one deserves its own bullet point. I have stopped going to the movie theater in my neighborhood because there are so many teenagers in the movies. And being teenagers, they can’t stop talking or texting even during the movie. I have in fact discovered another theater in a different neighboorhood to which older people go to. It is wonderful. Everyone is super polite. Noone talks during the movie. I love it.

Now that I think about it, I used to have a lot more pet peeves. I used be easily annoyed by stuff like buses that are late, things that you cannot really control. Now, I try to relax and remind myself that I could be more patient. Sometimes I still get frustrated but it is getting better.

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I prefer living in a big metropolitan city. Although I was born in a small city, I grew up in a big apartment complex with lots of kids. (I spent most of my time playing games with friends… ahh good times). So, I really like living in tall apartment buildings. In fact, I’d prefer a cute little flat to huge home with a backyard.

I also like to have the access to the infrastructure in big cities. I love public transportation and not having a car. I love the museums, the libraries, and the restaurants. I like being able to buy chocolate from the corner store in the middle of the night (very important .

Until now, I have not been able to see many big cities. I am from Turkey so I know Istanbul. I have been to Paris and Barcelona in Europe and I have seen most of the big cities in the US. I live in my favorite city, New York. It is very dynamic and energetic. There are people from all over the world, which is a great plus for me. Iguess I am really lucky.

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That people can misunderstand your intentions,  even if they are the best intentions in the world. It took more time but friends also taught me that you cannot make everyone happy and you should surround yourself with good, positive people rather than backstabbing b*tches

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Kleenex because my nose is always runny.
Chapstick.
A pen and my little notebook for ideas.
USB drive.
Gum (orbit mint mojito is my new favorite)
Wallet, keys, metrocard.
Hand cream.
Music player and headphones.  

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